It is hard being a mum – i’ll tell you that 🙂
There is no school of homemaking and motherhood to graduate from, and nor will we ever be fully qualified in the two, yet these skills are truly fundamental in the making of a happy, flourishing home.
When we run a household, we are continuously project managing a myriad of complex and intricate issues and a plethora of difficult and unpredictable circumstances, and it is only when a Mum’s heart is empowered can we radiate joy and strength in this task.
Motherhood is tough – because it is not just physical labour, it is also a heart labour.
Homemaking and motherhood need to be taken daily in prayer and surrendered to God moment by moment if they were to produce a harvest of joy.
Life with kids is messy, can be highly unpredictable, easily become uncontrollable. So how do we go from just merely surviving to actually thriving this busy, messy life?
Before we began, may I just encourage you, dear readers, that we can blossom right where we are. In the midst of what at times might feel like a whirlwind of a life, we can grow closer to God and be maximised in our potential – if we would keep our hearts humble, our minds learning and our hearts praising. Exactly right in the middle of dirty dishes, lazy laundry and crazy cooking… we can prosper right where we are.
Firstly, let us understand that God’s grace is sufficient for us – when we are weakest, He is strongest. We can come to Him to receive His mercy and grace in our most dire need – that even today.
When all is said and done, it is His grace, that will sustain us today. When we learn what it means to live and mother out of God’s covenant of grace, we know that we have all the resources available on hand to arrive at our destination 🙂 It is truly His grace and peace that will be ours in abundance through the knowledge of our God and Saviour, Jesus Christ – so quit comparing, quit sighing, quit the self defeating talks.
The second thing that has really helped me to garner more inner strength in mothering was to adopt a large family mentality. Yes, you read me right! No matter the number of children you have in your family, the skills and mindset required to run a large homeschooling family is highly essential in parenting. When I first came across the beautiful and inspirational family of Ang, I realised that they had a system for everything! That really spurred me on to streamlining, systemising and organising everything that i do within my own home. Not only did I become better in homemaking, but I was also a lot more effective in parenting, and guess what, the children are a lot happier too.
The third thing that has benefitted me a lot in the family life is to implement the heart of a home schooler.One of the greatest changes was that is that I began to teach my children. I never had the confidence that I can teach my own children, but taking on the full responsibility for their moral, spiritual and academic well being meant that I had to partner up with God and learn from the wisdom from other homes. When I realise that God had put me in charge of winning, discipling and equipping my children I began to fall in love all over again with the role of mothering, and most importantly, with my children.
At this stage, all my children except my youngest, go to a wonderful Christian school, something that I am immensely grateful about. But since that turning point, I have taken responsibility in educating, directing, navigating, discipling and empowering my children.
In some instances, i may do more than what the school teaches, in other cases, I may simply collaborate and further extend, in many cases it may be an ongoing communication with the children’s teachers to learn what they are learning, but no longer do I place my children’s learning goals in the hands of the school system anymore. The same goes for their spiritual life. I became very proactive in fostering and encouraging their growth of faith – I no longer hope that everything will turn out alright, nor do i passively hope that the church and their sunday school classes would do it, but I become thrilled and excited as I personally take on this holy call of teaching my children about God.
You might have seen a couple of things that I posted to see how we organise our learning, our routine and our meals, but there are so many other things that we have benefitted from through our constant desire to learn how to effectively structure our family life. We have also organised, and reorganised our home in the past 3 years and made our living spaces a breathable, enjoyable, much loved space that the family can function their best in.
I will share some practical things on how to feel in control of your home environment in the next post! Thanks for being on this journey together!