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on relationships and forgiveness






He said he’s had enough.

The screaming and the slamming of doors, the accusing and then the avoiding, her fear and her rage —  he’s about done with her.

She whispered back: “…not an ounce of love left in my bones to make this work.”

Said too she’s had had enough.

She hoped he’d lead and be her tower of  security, not caught on in a whole web of inferiority.

Two broken hearts never make one whole Valentine.

When they hammered hard with voices that hollered into the night like that, you can really feel a piercing.

A piercing of worlds breaking apart and dreams shattering great.

And when you’ve convinced yourselves that it’s really time to walk away is when you really walk away from the grace that’s able to reconcile two broken halves together.

When you decide to carry hurts unexplainable is when you compromise the gift of His love so unsurmountable to break impossible barriers, and remake deeply broken lives.

Let Him remake your true Valentine today, even though we’re way past Valentine.

Because we’re learning it: the hope for a marriage and a relationship vibrant is found in nailing our old man dead so we can walk in the image of the new man now living in us.

And this is true: God’s not done with us and though the night may feel long drawn-out, morning’s breaking, and there’s grace to die to yourself so that you can live for others.

And if someone’s gotta die to themselves, let that grace be upon us.

Because the burden of bridge building always falls on the one who is strong.

Max Lucado wrote this and he’s right:

“Relationships don’t thrive because the guilty are punished but because the innocent are merciful.

The way to let others rise and be what you’d hope them to be is to give them space and your forgiveness, so that they can truly be what they themselves hope to be and promise you they’ll be.

Relationships matter. But for relationships to be at their best, we need to each day learn the mathematics of forgiveness.

That in dying to ourselves to be right, we can gain the strength to forgive a little bit more of others’ weaknesses, cover a little bit more of others’ mistakes.

That in doing so our heart may learn to stop keeping score, and to start paying attention to how we can really live free.




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