What do I thirst for?
What is it that I so desire, which I’m driven towards?
And you? What is your one consuming passion?
Tell me honestly — are you filling up? Is your one soul full?
That lady preacher summed it right that night.
She said that the way you are feeling ultimately depends on the way you are filling up.
She said that what really fills you, that’s what will lift you.
Or leave you, and leak out of you.
I’ve had to swallow hard.
I’m aware of this inner ache, of this empty void that Netflix and the Net alone can’t quite fix.
There are inward wants and unquenchable drives that are deeply voracious…
They always want what is *more*.
And I’m ashamedly admitting it — I’ve become dog-low to satisfy it. I’m not proud of me.
Yet I’m still unsure of what I really want more of.
Or what we humanity can do to satisfy those insatiable, ferocious desires.
Is there a way out? A tacky acronym perhaps for the world’s temporal fix: the 3Gs?
Glory. Gold. Girls (Or Guys). But seriously?
And what if they’re still not quite capable of fixing those needs and filling us up?
Maybe then that lady preacher’s got a point.
Perhaps she’s right.
Perhaps it’s true that we can only be filled by God’s Spirit alone.
Perhaps it’s true that if we begin our thirst aright for Him, we will end our search satisfied in Him.
So I took her dare.
Took this dare of losing myself to find myself.
Took this dare of seeking Him so I could be filled and continuously infilled by Him.
Took this dare of letting heaven pour, while I stopped all my earthly measuring.
I long for what this world alone cannot contain.
So what if we all get together to take this dare?
What if we made it our sole obsession to be completely focused on knowing Him, loving Him and pleasing Him?
What if, by fixing our gaze on Him, we actually see the birth of a passion overriding and consuming all our inner aches, making us wholly full?
What if it didn’t matter what stage, season, or state of life we found ourselves in (or our bank account for that matter), if we could live life fully every day and let life overflow every moment because of that?
I want that, Ma’am.
I want this daily experience of Christ coming not to merely modify my behaviour, not to merely conform to my agenda, but to own my deepest darkest part, to change my damndest, deathly part — and to light me up and set me apart…
I’d like to never have to thirst again, please.
And I know what I’d do — I’d take all the measuring jugs, and stop mere containing, my intellectual rationalizing, my risky living and limiting what can and can’t be done.
Maybe we all can.
Maybe we can all take this dare of being that faceless, nameless generation and learn to weep private tears to produce public harvests.
Maybe together we can stop shortchanging ourselves with mere trails of human successes and instead, allow heaven’s savour to trace a holy desire.
I so want that.
Maybe this is our time to come with all our emptiness so we can be filled with all of Heaven’s fullness.
He will fill us to the overflow and stop every leak with what satisfies so fully, so deeply…